I have recently realised that as I reached 60 and start my retirement that it is inevitable that my friends will start dying. So recently I had news of the death of some of my school teachers at Epsom College like Roger Laine and most recently Murray Young. Murray was my Housemaster and looked after me in Loco Parentis and guided me through many of the formative events of my teenage years. In addition he inspired a love of Opera and took many boys to the English National Opera in London to see Rigoletto and Carmen and other amazing operas.
When I wrote my on line recipe book in May 2018 I dedicated the Moroccan page ( Honey and Date Tagine) to my first houseboy in Bahrain, Jay- or some knew him as Borj or Hermie, Suitos. In 2018 his Brother was killed in a car crash. The death was all the more sad because while Jay worked 7 days a week as an OFW ( Overseas Filipino Worker) in Bahrain he sent a lot of his money home to support his brother through college and until his graduation at the Military Academy. Their father was in the Military and was very disappointed when Jay opted out and did not follow in his footsteps so I know that both Dad and Jay would have been terribly proud of his brother's achievements. I remember inviting Jay to join me on vacation in the Philippines but he declined as he wanted to be there a year later when his brother graduated.
By 2019 sadly Jay and I lost touch and it was an incredible shock when in early 2021 we discovered that he too had died. My friend Patrick was still in touch with some friends of his and relayed the tragic news to me. We later found out he had been taken ill in 2020 with some rashes and gone back to the Philippines, where he had died of internal organ failure.
Ever since I heard the news I keep going to places that Jay and I went together in our 4 years of friendship like walking at Sitra Causeway, taking him home to Nabi Saleh, going to the first farmers market etc.
Coco , Jay and Tin Tin one Christmas
The lovely thing about Jay was that all my expat friends in Awali and all my Phillipino friends accepted him and invited him to parties, 50th Birthday dinners and the like. I know Mike and Nea became very close to Jay through our many Christmas dinners and Birthday parties where they often drank through the night together long after I had retired to bed.
Mike, Tina, Coco and Jay at Christmas
More recently I got in touch with a Phillipino here in Bahrain and when a female friend of his found out who he was talking to asked him to ask me if I knew Borj. She thought it was too much of a coincidence that the guy her friend was talking to was the friend that Borj always talked about. You can imagine how comforting that felt to know that he cared for me as much as I cared for him.
So why publish this now- well it was Jay who gave me a Tagine Pot from Lakeland ( now closed) in which I presented my Honey and Date Tagine! According to Chester who researched some additional material for the e recipe book version "Tagine is a Maghrebi dish which is named after the earthenware dish in which it is cooked". I can also add that the conical lid allows the moisture to rise in the oven and then return to the food to keep it moist. The orange Tagine pot , now in storage in Palawan, is the only gift I will have to remind me of Jay. I know, in the years ahead, I will always think of him when I cook this recipe, or many of the others in a Tagine cook book that I bought.
I have laced this blog with my favourite photos of Jay, and I hope you have enjoyed my special tribute to him and his brother.
I will add the Tagine recipe in a separate Blog later
Jay's early departure from this world has taught me to live each day as it comes and not to put off until tomorrow what you can do today.
Please, everyone, stay safe, wash your hands, santise, keep your distance, and stay alive
Thank you
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Hello, I am The British Kabayan! Feel free to read my stories.
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